Wednesday, July 31, 2013

When the Word for This Season is "Hold On!"

It has been four weeks since our {foster} baby, Little Man, left us.


A very, LONG, four weeks.

Two weeks ago we got a beautiful long afternoon visit with him and bio dad.
This was glorious.
This was hard.

I do not know if I can do "just a visit" again
And yet...I know in my heart, I would never say no to seeing that precious face.

Every day I pray for him, long for him, sing over him in spite of the miles that separate us.
I pray for his healing, for his heart and mind, for the miracles concerning his life...and ours...that the Lord has promised me. And recently, I started praying for bio dad and bio mom, for their full restoration emotionally, physically, mentally, and spiritually.

I am believing for redemption to be all over this journey.
I am believing for things that the natural eye cannot see.
I am believing for this story...and all the characters involved...to shout the fame of Jesus Christ.
I am believing for a life song of His grace and glory.

I am believing for the radical.
Not because that is my nature
Or because believing this way comes easy.

I am believing this way because Jesus asked me to do so.
Because He placed this overwhelming momma heart in me.
Because He told me that our stories are not done being intertwined yet.
Because HE WILL NOT LET ME.....LET GO.

And how that would be easier...
to shut this door,
to cry and ache and grieve,
and then to just move on with our lives.

But HE will not let me.
He Will Not.

So I sit here
in the tension of the waiting
not knowing exactly HOW I am supposed to walk this road.

"I'll teach you..."
He whispers to my soul in the darkest night.

And each day I check in again...
"Still, Jesus? How much longer?"

His heart smiles and breathes new strength for this day into my weary soul.
"Hold on, baby girl, hold on.  Just a little bit longer.  Just a little bit more."

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