A year and a half ago, after almost a year and a half into our journey of TTC, I began to feel the discouragement keenly. Simultaneously, Arno was feeling strongly that the Lord was moving us towards buying a house. I had been hesitant to move forward in this. I mean the "plan" is babies first, house second, right??
One day, as I read my daily Bible reading, I came across these verses in Isaiah 54:
1 “Sing, O childless woman,
you who have never given birth!
Break into loud and joyful song, O Jerusalem,
you who have never been in labor.
For the desolate woman now has more children
than the woman who lives with her husband,”
says the Lord.
2 “Enlarge your house; build an addition.
Spread out your home, and spare no expense!
3 For you will soon be bursting at the seams.
Your descendants will occupy other nations
and resettle the ruined cities.
you who have never given birth!
Break into loud and joyful song, O Jerusalem,
you who have never been in labor.
For the desolate woman now has more children
than the woman who lives with her husband,”
says the Lord.
2 “Enlarge your house; build an addition.
Spread out your home, and spare no expense!
3 For you will soon be bursting at the seams.
Your descendants will occupy other nations
and resettle the ruined cities.
In the months that followed, the Lord opened up doors to not only purchase a house that we loved, but also provided long-term renters almost immediately upon realizing we would be moving back to America. I thought the "expanse" meant the house literally, but I can see how the Father's dreams for us are even larger. He is stretching us in faith, in finances, in every aspect of our "human" nature, so because I am human......
SOME DAYS ARE JUST REAL HARD!
Hard to trust....
Hard to keep the faith....
Hard to see and to feel His hands holding me close....
Hard to remember that "the Lord is not slack concerning His promises...."
and sometimes....
JUST HARD just BECAUSE "I" cannot any longer!!
So the Lord gave me a new promise from Psalm 126 to hold onto because He is gracious and because I forget, and I believe that this heralds a new season for my life:
1 When the LORD restored the fortunes of Zion,
we were like those who dreamed.
2 Our mouths were filled with laughter,
our tongues with songs of joy.
Then it was said among the nations,
“The LORD has done great things for them.”
3 The LORD has done great things for us,
and we are filled with joy.
we were like those who dreamed.
2 Our mouths were filled with laughter,
our tongues with songs of joy.
Then it was said among the nations,
“The LORD has done great things for them.”
3 The LORD has done great things for us,
and we are filled with joy.
My favorite line is "....we were like those who dreamed...." which is spoken on the coat tails of restoration. What Satan has tried (and some days almost succeeded) to steal from my life, the Lord will NOT ONLY restore, but it will be SO GREAT that it will feel as if I am dreaming...to the point that "the nations" will see and proclaim the goodness of the Lord due to His hand upon my life.
What a beautiful promise!
And while the promise is beautiful, real life is MESSY!
I don't get it right every day or have the faith that I want to, yet I know He is "faithful, even when I am unfaithful," or wanting to give up and throw in the towel. When I don't know who I am or where I am going, I know, in my Spirit, He is holding me close, calling to me to rest for awhile, to let go, to trust, to give up control....and HE will fill my mouth with laughter and RESTORE!!
What are you believing for God to restore this year?
What promise are you standing on that He has made to you?
What do you do when you doubt His hand, His love, His promises?
3 comments:
Psalm 126 was my TTC chapter, too! I couldn't read through it without tearing up. Even now, it is my life chapter. "The Lord has done great things for us!" And someday you will reap the harvest of your tears!
Thanks, Anna! Your life and your faith throughout your journey so similar to mine encourages me often! Thanks for shining your light SO brightly!
Psalm 126 was my TTC chapter, too! I couldn't read through it without tearing up. Even now, it is my life chapter. "The Lord has done great things for us!" And someday you will reap the harvest of your tears!
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