Dare To Write

Can I be honest?
No, I mean really and truly honest?

Life has been a little overwhelming lately.
And scared
And intimidating.

{SIGH}

Wow. That felt good to get that out.

A couple of months ago we finally bought the house we had been waiting for. We packed, we cleaned, we moved in. And then we started a foster care home study process TWO WEEKS later. No seriously. We really did. We kept unpacking and organizing and finding a semblance of order in our home, little by little by painstakingly little. We filled out paperwork and more paperwork and then, you guessed it, even more paperwork.  We put locks on scary attics doors and random closet cubbies and changed our water temperature setting {Who knew you could do THAT?}. We engaged in interview after interview after gut-wrenching, soul-baring interview.

Our lives have changed a lot and not so very much all at the same time.

And I kind of slowed down my writing and posting
Aaaaa....Whhhhoollle.... Loooot.
Not really on purpose.
It just kind of happened.

And somehow in the past week or so, as I have tried to jump back in, I have felt so very far behind -- in relationships, in opportunities, in writing skills, in confidence, in grace to simply be me.

While I so just want to stay here in this space of darkness and indecision and fear, {Oh there is that ugly word again!}, I know that I simply cannot. So with Intimidation shouting in my ears, "What do you have to say?" or "You know that someone else out there could say it better and stronger and with more impact & eloquence than you ever could," I dare to write anyway.

Not because it's perfect.
Not because it's beautiful.
Not because I have all of the answers.

Not because I'm smart.
Not because I'm eloquent.
Not because I know I can weave words to change the world.

I dare to write because His heart and soul and Spirit inside of me scream softly and whisper loudly with unrelenting purpose and destiny,

"You were made for this and so much more.

Don't stop the dreamer.

Don't silence the artist.

Don't stand in the way of the sinner 
working her way through grace 
on this writing journey."

Now my soul breathes a little deeper as life-giving CPR fills my dried up soul.

"He who began a good work in you 
is faithful to complete it 
until the day of Christ Jesus."

Philippians 1:6

What fears are holding you back? 

What is stopping you from daring to do the thing inside 

that you know you were meant to do

....regardless of whether you are the best or not....?