The Legacy She Gave Me

I think the quality that I most admire in my mom is her selflessness.

I can remember being about 14 or 15 and having my favorite scent from Victoria's Secret - Vanilla - in lotion & body spray. This was a special treat as a missionary kid, and as a natural "saver", I wanted to ration it out to last me for awhile. One day, my mom asked me to use some, and I wouldn't let her because I didn't want to "use it all up too quickly." I am embarrassed to remember that day because after all, she is the one who had purchased the set for me, and ugh! I have felt bad about that every time I remember it! But what amazes me when I remember that story is that instead of my mom reminding me of the fact that SHE did in fact give me the thing I was holding onto so dearly, she simply said okay and let it go.

She's like that. My mom. She has such a gentle grace -- a way that allows room for others to be themselves, even when when they are wrong and need to grow or learn a lesson. She lets the Holy Spirit do HIS thing and doesn't try to do His job.

There are so many stories over the years that reveal this quality in my mom, and not just with my sister and I. I feel confident that if you surveyed my dad, her sisters, her best friends over the years, they would all say the same thing about her.....

My mom is a giver.

I read this quote a few months ago, and it is SO my mom!!

A mother is a person who seeing there are only

four pieces of pie for five people,

promptly announces she never did care for pie.

~Tenneva Jordan

The older I get, I truly wonder if I will ever be able to mother with such selflessness the way my mom always did. I wonder if I will be able to give my children, my disciples, my friends, my husband the room to be who they are without trying to control or micromanage them into the "RIGHT" way of thinking.

And yet, I don't discount that the investment of being raised by such an amazing woman SURELY had to have had on me in addition to God's amazing grace.

I read a blog post a few months ago by Sara at Every Bitter Thing is Sweet, who has adopted her son & daughter from Ethiopia and has also experienced a personal struggle of infertility, about the inheritance that she is giving to her children. This specific post was about and to her daughter. Here is an excerpt:

Her inheritance comes (from God) through me. She is my legacy.

What I win in my lifetime — in terms of a hopeful perspective

on all He has allowed and joy in the midst of “setback”

— she gets to live out.

That impacted me beyond words, and today that made me think about my mom and the life she has lived and the amazing words of wisdom she has so kindly spoken into my life over the years.

You see, I grew up the oldest in my family, but I wasn't my mom's first pregnancy. I was her third.

My sister, Mom's first pregnancy, died at 10 months old in a plane crash that Mom and Dad were also in. And the 2nd pregnancy ended in miscarriage.

The mother that my mom became was largely due to overcoming the "setbacks" and "heart breaks" that she experienced. God prepared her heart to mother a little girl with a SUPER soft heart and a VERY analytical brain. She gave me the freedom to be myself, even in making mistakes, so that I, too, could understand the beautiful inheritance that I have from the Father.

I pray that in my own journey of waiting and personal heartache, qualities are developed in me to be the kind of mom that I was raised by - one who gives unselfishly, loves unconditionally, and laughs ridiculously....A LOT!

I love you, Mom! Happy Mother's Day!