Thursday, May 5, 2011

The Legacy She Gave Me

I think the quality that I most admire in my mom is her selflessness.

I can remember being about 14 or 15 and having my favorite scent from Victoria's Secret - Vanilla - in lotion & body spray. This was a special treat as a missionary kid, and as a natural "saver", I wanted to ration it out to last me for awhile. One day, my mom asked me to use some, and I wouldn't let her because I didn't want to "use it all up too quickly." I am embarrassed to remember that day because after all, she is the one who had purchased the set for me, and ugh! I have felt bad about that every time I remember it! But what amazes me when I remember that story is that instead of my mom reminding me of the fact that SHE did in fact give me the thing I was holding onto so dearly, she simply said okay and let it go.

She's like that. My mom. She has such a gentle grace -- a way that allows room for others to be themselves, even when when they are wrong and need to grow or learn a lesson. She lets the Holy Spirit do HIS thing and doesn't try to do His job.

There are so many stories over the years that reveal this quality in my mom, and not just with my sister and I. I feel confident that if you surveyed my dad, her sisters, her best friends over the years, they would all say the same thing about her.....

My mom is a giver.

I read this quote a few months ago, and it is SO my mom!!

A mother is a person who seeing there are only
four pieces of pie for five people,
promptly announces she never did care for pie.
~Tenneva Jordan

The older I get, I truly wonder if I will ever be able to mother with such selflessness the way my mom always did. I wonder if I will be able to give my children, my disciples, my friends, my husband the room to be who they are without trying to control or micromanage them into the "RIGHT" way of thinking.

And yet, I don't discount that the investment of being raised by such an amazing woman SURELY had to have had on me in addition to God's amazing grace.

I read a blog post a few months ago by Sara at Every Bitter Thing is Sweet, who has adopted her son & daughter from Ethiopia and has also experienced a personal struggle of infertility, about the inheritance that she is giving to her children. This specific post was about and to her daughter. Here is an excerpt:

Her inheritance comes (from God) through me. She is my legacy.
What I win in my lifetime — in terms of a hopeful perspective
on all He has allowed and joy in the midst of “setback”
— she gets to live out.

That impacted me beyond words, and today that made me think about my mom and the life she has lived and the amazing words of wisdom she has so kindly spoken into my life over the years.

You see, I grew up the oldest in my family, but I wasn't my mom's first pregnancy. I was her third.

My sister, Mom's first pregnancy, died at 10 months old in a plane crash that Mom and Dad were also in. And the 2nd pregnancy ended in miscarriage.

The mother that my mom became was largely due to overcoming the "setbacks" and "heart breaks" that she experienced. God prepared her heart to mother a little girl with a SUPER soft heart and a VERY analytical brain. She gave me the freedom to be myself, even in making mistakes, so that I, too, could understand the beautiful inheritance that I have from the Father.

I pray that in my own journey of waiting and personal heartache, qualities are developed in me to be the kind of mom that I was raised by - one who gives unselfishly, loves unconditionally, and laughs ridiculously....A LOT!

I love you, Mom! Happy Mother's Day!


FaithBarista_FreshJamBadgeG


Mama’s Losin’ It

14 comments:

Patty Ann said... Best Blogger Tips

What a beautiful post about your mother, she sound wonderful!

Amanda said... Best Blogger Tips

Isn't it strange how some of the best people also had some of the hardest experiences in life?

Alison Kinlaw said... Best Blogger Tips

I love it, Lindsey!!! You have such an awesome Mama. She's truly beautiful... inside and out! :) loved reading this.

Kasi Lyndaker said... Best Blogger Tips

Lyns, you are always able to put into words the beautiful story of a life well lived! Mom has truly been the type of mom all women should hope to be for their children! Love you, Momma!

Stephanie said... Best Blogger Tips

I got goosebumps when I read about the plane crash! What a terrible, heartbreaking tragedy.

stephanie@metropolitanmama.net

Lindsey V said... Best Blogger Tips

@Patty Ann Thank you so much...she is pretty amazing!

@Amanda
It does seem like that...I guess it is the hardships that make them so awesome!

@Alison Kinlaw Thanks, friend! I feel SO blessed!!

Lindsey V said... Best Blogger Tips

@Kasi Lyndaker Thanks, sis! We really got THE BEST, right?

@Stephanie
Yeah, my mom is a writer but has never really "written" about that. I am hoping she will do that one day, either here, on her own yet-to-be-set-up blog, or a book. She has a wealth of wisdom to share!

noreen said... Best Blogger Tips

Hi Lindsey, what a wonderful tribute to your mom! It inspires me to be a better mom to my son!

Lindsey V said... Best Blogger Tips

@noreen
Oh, Noreen! The fact that you have that desire is probably a good indicator that you already ARE a GREAT mom!

Bonnie Gray said... Best Blogger Tips

Lindsey, I loved this post because I got to know you better and got to meet your loving mother. It touches me to see the legacy a loving mother leaves her child -- and look at your beautiful heart! For sure, you are poised as a life-giving woman to everyone around you! :) The journey of faith is always full of unexpected twists and turns... but everything better turns out sweet. Thanks for sharing the blog and also your mom's legacy. And YOU.

Cherry said... Best Blogger Tips

Thank you, Lindsey, for these beautiful words about your beautiful mother! I especially liked this ... "She has such a gentle grace -- a way that allows room for others to be themselves, even when they are wrong and need to grow or learn a lesson. She lets the Holy Spirit do HIS thing and doesn't try to do His job." What a good reminder for all of us as mothers ... thanks for sharing!

Alison Kinlaw said... Best Blogger Tips

I love it, Lindsey!!! You have such an awesome Mama. She's truly beautiful... inside and out! :) loved reading this.

Amanda said... Best Blogger Tips

Isn't it strange how some of the best people also had some of the hardest experiences in life?

Kat Biggie said... Best Blogger Tips

Wow. Your mother must have had incredible strength. My heart hurts for her, as i know the pain from the loss of a baby. You are a beautiful writer.... I followed you from Just Write this week. Thank you!

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